1. Baptized In Bud

We are here gathered
under the pale moonlight
To seek blessings. We offer sacrifice
to the tube that rises from the temple pit
We pledged our oath unto this dark device

Evil – Bong of the damned
Discovered by slaves in the sand
Calling – Voice of the flame
The one who goes by many names

The pungent odor of
Weed is stagnant in the air
A thick green fog surrounds our dark layer
Let's open the book
from the Marijuana Gods
The Necronomichron
shall guide us in our prayers

Behold the giant Bong
That enlightens all those who inhale
Faces swirl in its shaft
Restless spirits locked in with Weedcraft
Symbols carved at its base
That took centuries to translate
Beware to those that try
In smoke thy lungs will be baptized

It is pre-ordained, that
One is selected every
four hundred thousand years
Chosen from the eldest of
our order for this gift most High
The gateway of the chosen
will then be opened
for our masters dank sacrifice

He will behold the sublime
visions of the ones that are most wise
Soon he will be.....

Baptized
Baptized
Baptized
Baptized in Bud

He will ascend to the temples peak
On staircases terrifying steep
Where the mouthpiece to this bong awaits
Behind the forbidden gates
The Necronomichron
Will guide him in the world beyond
That lies within his mind
In smoke his lungs will be baptized
Baptized in Bud

2. Zero Weed Tolerance

He won't admit he has a problem
Every time he starts to smoke
He loses control and starts killing
No one is safe from his onslaught

Sensations dulled, he can't feel anything
So stoned and paranoid, violently paranoid
Half baked, he's headed
towards a shopping mall
For a killing spree

Hacking, stabbing he is laughing at
All the splattered blood

Zero Weed Tolerance
All this carnage only after smoking one hit
Zero Weed Tolerance
A psychotic lightweight

The morbid costs of hydroponic
weeds affect on a fragile mind
A savage monster was created
and unleashed on all of mankind
People screaming in fear as they flee
Horrid sight of grisly death
Caused by a THC crazed zombie

Abhorrent THC nightmare, inhuman
Schizophrenic and ripped
out of his fucking mind

Police call for backup
They need help
They tried tear gas but it had no effect
It was astounding
They used a grenade to immolate
But panic set in when he charged at them
While he was still engulfed in flame

Zero Weed Tolerance
All this carnage after only
after smoking one hit
Zero Weed Tolerance
He should've stayed home and had a beer

3. Weedless Ones

Behind the shadows
Foul beings searching for your stash
They are creatures known as weedless ones

Watching and waiting
Pinching your bag until it is gone
Taken by the weedless ones

Putrid rat-like goblins to
abhorrent to ever see sunlight
Repellant human-like faces and bodies
But more animal than they are man

Their search for drugs left them deformed
They are deranged,
Pumping through their veins crushing levels of THC
Diminutive blasphemies

Cursed with crippling addiction
They're slaves to narcotics
The weedless ones

Have come for you tonight
While you're passed out in your mom's basement
Silent they smoke your last hit
Leaving none left when you awaken
You look at the coffee table
to see that your last bong hit has now been stolen

You search the floor and between the couch cushions
But you'll never see that Weed again
In the distance you can hear them laughing at you
There's nothing you can do
But to accept the hand that you've been
dealt and think about killing yourself

Cursed with crippling addiction
They're slaves to narcotics

The weedless ones
They've come for you
while you're baked watching television
distracted you let your guard down
Now your Bag of Pot can't be found!

Behind the shadows
Foul beings searching for your stash
They are creatures known as weedless ones
Watching and waiting
Pinching your bag until it is gone
Taken by the weedless ones

Tonight they've come for you
while you are eating that old pizza
You thought you could
have a midnight snack
Now you'll never get your Weed back!

4. Individual Pot Patterns

From this bong I smoke
A gush of water bubbles
Every night I wait to light
Up another joint
De-stalking me every bud
I keep the seeds for later
I green-top the fucking bowl
Every single time
Packed tight in the pipe
Herb begins to smolder
Burnt Bud smoke exhaled
I saved none for later

I refuse to ever stop
It is a part of me
Until the grave I'll always crave
Smoking weed

On this bowl I puff
And watch the rising fog
Every breath another toke
I feel the warmth inside me
Sprinkle hash on top some
Weed to make a potent salad
I try not to choke
and hit that shit again

I refuse to ever stop
It is a part of me
Until the grave I'll always crave
Smoking weed

Vaporize!
Vaporize!
Vaporize!
Vaporize!

Individual
Individual Pot Patterns
Individual
Individual Pot Patterns
Individual
Individual Pot Patterns

From this bong I smoke
Off this joint I hit
So stoned I cannot see
So baked I can't stop laughing
From this bong I smoke
Off this joint I hit
So stoned I cannot see
So baked I can't stop laughing

Individual
Individual Pot Patterns
Individual
Individual Pot Patterns
Individual
Individual Pot Patterns

De-stalking me every bud
I keep the seeds for later
Packed tight in the pipe
The Herb begins to smolder

I refuse to ever stop
It is a part of me
Until the grave I'll always crave
Smoking weed

5. Pull The Carb

Fire, billows from the rib-cage
My victims torso filling with smoke
I am gripping the cadavers scalp

A violent jerk removes the head
My lungs inhale the smoke from its neck
My stoned expression, my face is covered in gore

I killed you inside your home
Then I filled your corpse with Smoke
I will decapitate you

To pull the carb
Inhale the bong load of
Weed through the neck stump
My grotesque fantasy will be a reality
Nothing can stop me 'til I get my fix
I lust to pull the carb
Everyday I need to find a new victim
I'll never be satisfied
until the smoke is inside
The moment you die
Nothing will ever get you any more high

My apartment is full of rotting cadavers
Marijuana masks the disgusting stench
My life is a horrific nightmare

Resin forms in the chest cavity
Inside the lifeless body of the deceased
The vital organs have been removed inside

It will never end
Taking bong loads from your open neck hole

I killed you inside your home
Then I filled your corpse with Smoke
I will decapitate you

To pull the carb
Inhale the bong load of
Weed through the neck stump
My grotesque fantasy will be a reality
Nothing can stop me 'til I get my fix
I lust to pull the carb
Everyday I am out searching for victims
I'll never be satisfied
until the smoke is inside
The moment you die
Nothing will ever get you any more high

6. Considered Dank

Exploring the polar regions
Snow clad mountains
loom behind jagged glaciers
This scientific research expedition
Has lead our team to
wastelands yet to be explored
The captain of our ship was in panic
A strange green
vegetation had inexplicably
Started growing on his navigation tools
Further tests concluded that they were

Considered Dank
Considered Dank
Considered Dank
Considered Dank

Its rate of growth was highly alarming
Spreading quickly over every surface of our ship
Our team of scientists evacuated
On several escape rafts
to a nearby icy shore
Attempts to contact help proved useless
We had to find shelter
from the frigid temperatures
Two of us went out to
scout the surroundings
To find a way to survive in this cold

We spotted something in the distance
At the foot of a massive mountain
An opening to a small cavern
There could be safe haven within
When we returned to report
We saw snow splattered with gore
The other team members were murdered
There bodies were torn limb from limb
The snow was red with pools of blood
Spreading from bite marks in their skin

How could this have happened?
Terror began to set in

Considered Dank
Considered Dank
Considered Dank
Considered Dank

I turned in time to see
My former colleague
Wielding a bloody knife
Coming for me!!

7. Voice Of The Bowl

I could see that he'd lost his mind
He was holding a bloody serrated camp knife
and he was running at me with
crazed eyes screaming in panic
"Now its time for all un-stoned to die!"

With my revolver
This threat easily was ended with a head shot
It was a close shave, I knew that I had no choice
I had to get back to that cave

Once inside what I beheld defied all logic
Miles of caverns filled with huge stalks of dank Chronic

Just like the vines that we saw on board our ship
I had to know what was the cause of all of this
As I went deeper the smell got more intense
It defied all logic, nothing seemed to make sense

Countless hours passed as I hiked deeper into the pit
That's when I heard a faint
ghostly voice beckoning within my mind

I finally reached a magnificent chamber
With a glass bowl levitating in the center
It spoke

"I've been waiting for you to come to me
The Weed smoking savior
Foretold in the prophecy
Obey my command
The time has now come to smoke
The forbidden Dank
Now come forth. INHALE!"

Voice from the bowl......

My body began moving
I struggled against it but I could not resist
It was overwhelming
I gave into its dank will

I put my lips
On the glass mouthpiece
And the bowl was lit
When the smoke was entered my
lungs I beheld a vision
Of a world covered in Pot from the
Necronomichron

8. THC Crystal Mountain

Sweat drenched, exhale the holy smoke.
Feel its power take over your soul
Enter the realm of pain and death
You are now under its control

Bow to its hellish majesty
Its will shall be done

The THC Crystal Mountain

Many others have come to kneel before it, they are just slaves
Forever lost inside its best and terrible maze
These stoners are cursed forever to be
Endlessly Jones-ing without any Weed Lost for eternity

You are not going to share their fate
It has something else for you in store
You have been chosen to command
Its armies in the Marijuana wars

Bow to its hellish majesty
Its will shall be done

The THC crystal mountain

You are not going to share their fate
It has something else for you in store
You have been chosen to command
Its armies in the Marijuana wars

Bow to its hellish majesty
Its will shall be done

The THC crystal mountain

The ground below begins to mutate
Forming into a giant gate
A wormhole to get back to earth
The Marijuana army now awaits
Screaming souls begin to billow
Like smoke rising out of a bong
From the top of the horrible mountain
Swirling in a terrifying maelstrom

Bow to its hellish majesty
Its will shall be done

The THC crystal mountain

9. With Their Hash He Will Create

Roaches of those forgotten
The very foundation of his creation
Harvesting (the) THC
Of his deceased malpractice victims

Inherit has scraps of those who've died
His supply will be multiplied

With their has he'll create
Form them from resin, kief coagulates

Golems of gathered hashish
Soldiers of stoned await injection
by Syringes filled with errl

The med card you carry
could mean your life
Suspended animation of wax combined

With their has he'll create
Form them from resin, kief coagulates

His stoned eyes now awake
Born form the oven, baked

Sticky fleshed monstrosity
Brownish globs maneuvering ever so stinkily
Figure stumbles clumsily
Golem sparkling ever crystally
One hit of his very fiber
Could drive a mortal insane

Granules of potent slate
Hashish melded with hate

The ashtray is his playground
Mutating fallen joints together
Brown blocks finally complete
Finding a home within the structure

The med card you carry
could mean your life
Suspended animation of wax combined

Inherit hash scraps of those who've died
His supply will then be multiplied

10. From Wisdom To Baked

Beyond the reach
Of our modern day carefree living
In complete isolation
Lived a family of sick backwoods cretins
Drug induced retardation
They had no money for fertilizer
To use to feed their precious plants
That's when this story gets absurd....

A strange urban legend started to spread
In the nearby town, the rumors said
There was a hidden field of
Pot in the woods
But bad things happen if you are caught

From wisdom to baked
From wisdom to baked

Three more teenagers decided to try
They couldn't have known
how gruesomely they'd die

From wisdom to baked
From wisdom to baked

Their plan was simple
It was going to be fun
It would be a big mistake
A nightmare that has only just begun

They started to loose track of time
The car had been left behind
Directions were getting crisscrossed
It sunk in that they were starting to get lost

Getting tired and frustrated,
they'd had enough
Setting up a campsite to spend the night
Alone, the batteries were
dead in their cellphones
Everyone was worried,
they just wanted to go home

From wisdom to baked
From wisdom to baked

The night was dark and they were terrified
They had the feeling
that something wasn't right

From wisdom to baked
From wisdom to baked

No one inside the tent would ever see
That they were being surrounded by hillbillies

11. Medicinal Healing

The next day never came for the stoners
No one would ever hear
all their muffled cries
As they slept an axe
went through two of their necks
Leaving one to be the last to die

When he saw the carnage
he started screaming
As he did they tied him to a nearby tree
A dull blade skillfully sliced right through
His stomach and ribcage

Medicinal Healing
The blood started to spray
His life was slipping away

Medicinal Healing
By his feet in the mud
A bucket was placed to
catch the dripping blood

The corpses were dragged in body bags
To the killers home a burned out shack
This family was deranged.
They spent everyday
Smoking Marijuana, crystal meth,
methamphetamines and crack

Their ugly addiction driving them to kill

The bodies carelessly tossed on the floor
Everyone went to work,
they'd done this before
Their ghastly inbred sons removed limbs
to fuel the hydroponic system

A machine used to grind chunks of flesh
pulverized body parts that were left
It was pumped into the veins of a corpse
That belonged to their dead grandfather

He had died from an overdose
His dead body was left
there in his favorite chair
The families weed supply
was starting to run short
They had reached their last resort

They planted seeds inside the cadaver
And within hours it began to work
Out of his flesh vines began to grow
from the nutrients of the decomposed

Medicinal healing
They knew it would stop growing
unless the blood started flowing
Medicinal healing
Missing persons reports
kept on coming up short
On the kids trying to score